I've been faking it for a long, looong, looooooooong time. I've been pretending to be, how did you call me?...an "intellectual", standing behind others, repeating, parroting, regurgitating, when I had no understanding of anything I said, sexualizing everything, implying I'm an alpha-male, an "overman", an aristocrat, noble, intelligent. I'm just an average, lonely, nobody with nothing to say that would get me acknowledged, respected...loved. A failure. I've dropped the masks...you try it.
Who do you want to be? Who are you?
If the BDSM was not ultimately consensual, not role-play, then it would be damn near impossible to actually enjoy it; one would be too worried about trying to escape, infused with the fear that the Mistress may murder him by the end of the session.
Knowing in the back of one's mind that one will make it out alive by the end, this allows the person to relax and enjoy the experience, sink into it.
It's akin to riding a roller coaster; would people actually go on, enjoy it, if they knew they were going to die?
Another analogy: movies. When we watch movies, we know they are ultimately fake; but we temporarily surrender disbelief and become subsumed within the story, so we can actually enjoy it.
Now, I'm trying to keep this thread as non-personal, objective as possible. Forget about me and let's focus on the subject at hand.
Satyr Daemon
Gender : Posts : 37263 Join date : 2009-08-24 Age : 58 Location : Hyperborea
You mean like a "warrior" entering the octagon knowing there's a referee there to stop the fight before he gets really hurt? You mean like going to the movies, immersing yourself in the fake scenario knowing the lights will go on, the doors will open, and what you "experienced" will not follow you home? You mean, like when someone asks "How are you?" not caring what the answer is but going through the formalities, the ritual, to pretend he's part of a caring loving world?
_________________ γνῶθι σεαυτόν μηδέν άγαν
Satyr Daemon
Gender : Posts : 37263 Join date : 2009-08-24 Age : 58 Location : Hyperborea
You mean like when you pretended to be a boxer, an artist, a warrior, a teacher, a thinker, a philosopher?
Am I pretending now? Let's fake it together.
This forum is now an area of faking-it. KT = ILP light; diet Humanarchy, for those with a sensitive digestive system...Philosophy Now for diabetics, and the reality intolerant. We would not want the fumes of irritated bowls invading our senses.
Have we not been faking it, all this time? I have. Are we not able to shut-off the computer and exit this fake internet world...do we not all have a safe word?
_________________ γνῶθι σεαυτόν μηδέν άγαν
Satyr Daemon
Gender : Posts : 37263 Join date : 2009-08-24 Age : 58 Location : Hyperborea
The best Dominatrix is the one with that motherly spirit. She will pull her swing, when she lands her whip upon your flesh, and she will take care to give you loving pain, surveying your face for indications that you've had enough, though you may not know it, and want more.
The best Dominatrix is the one with that motherly spirit. She will pull her swing, when she lands her whip upon your flesh, and she will take care to give you loving pain, surveying your face for indications that you've had enough, though you may not know it, and want more.
Sure, one could interpret the dominatrix as being a mother figure.
I see the dominatrix more as an instructress, a teacher.
Why is punishment so erotic, Satyr?
Satyr Daemon
Gender : Posts : 37263 Join date : 2009-08-24 Age : 58 Location : Hyperborea
There are many like li'l Erik out there, lost and wandering with abs. no self-direction, no north stars of stability.
The vast open life instead of hammering at the chest with a pressure to make something of themselves, that very scope and phobia of space sends them into cocooning themselves within the most mundane and worthless pursuits as an Ends in itself.
BDSM maybe initiating, but into what ultimately? Where exactly? For how long exactly?
What the f--- is one doing with immersion into these self-negating phantasms?
They place the blade into the sand, draw a line upon it....will she help them fall upon it, or will she save them, for posterity, for the coming battle?
There are many like li'l Erik out there, lost and wandering with abs. no self-direction, no north stars of stability.
The vast open life instead of hammering at the chest with a pressure to make something of themselves, that very scope and phobia of space sends them into cocooning themselves within the most mundane and worthless pursuits as an Ends in itself.
BDSM maybe initiating, but into what ultimately? Where exactly? For how long exactly?
What the f--- is one doing with immersion into these self-negating phantasms?
To be or not to be? And what?
Go figure.
There's a reason I chose " Wotan " as my moniker on AOE...
I'm not into BDSM for the same reasons some degenerate hedonist is; it's actually a somewhat mystical thing for me, for lack of better words...cathartic, spiritual.
Know Thyself
Satyr Daemon
Gender : Posts : 37263 Join date : 2009-08-24 Age : 58 Location : Hyperborea
Erik, you should take my son's pic, the one someone else uploaded, and put a penis in his mouth...you know like a true warrior of your stature would. Do something effective, like drawing horns on his ugly head, and showing me how he would look after you tore off his face, like you promised.
Then go to ILP and share with those who already know me, and why I am as I am. Show us how intimidating you are, in real life.
Yeah, the BDSM community is replete with people who are into it as an end in itself, just looking to satiate their base, hedonistic desires; but there is a refined form of BDSM that isn't all about gross indulgence.
There is vulgar BDSM and refined/sophisticated BDSM. The latter is what interests me the most --- my style; the former is intriguing for psychological/anthropological reasons.
Like you insinuated, it can act as initiation into self-knowledge, self-communion.
One can achieve a transpersonal state of awareness, beyond pain and pleasure.
"Chaaoooooos! Oh oh ooh (There comes the punishment) Your look has got me in chaos!! (World-wide) Oh oh oh (Daddy) Kiss me when you're dancing!!! There the pressure's coming!!! (Come On) The two of us will continue travelling!!! In chaos (Yeah) ooh ooh
This time, you won't get rid of me, We went hands up, Get aggressive for me, to stick you to the horn I domintate you, you dominate me, and in the end, I'm sure I have dynamite for this mine (the best of all time, come on) Suffocating
Look how well you seduce me, That little girl, when she turns out the lights I like it like that, there, you're showing off I already gave her the green light to abuse me Abuse me..."
Apollonian order surrendering to Dionysian chaos/energy.
Surrender, as prior mentioned, is not a weakness per se:
If strong enough of letting go of control is all what it is about, and role-playing the role of a female, what stops him from surrendering to an alpha male?
How is getting abused by a female more insightful and initiatory than getting abused by a male?
So a male can take a woman doing that to him, because he secretly knows she is weak? Is SM a subliminal narcissism?
If there's nothing hedonistic/erotic about it, what does it matter what gender the dom. is.?
Eric, you're a funny guy. Indeed, you are like Socrates: you spin phenomena in order to conform to your own world webbing at the time. For you, I don't think it is to necessarily feel power over others, although there is a hint of guilt tripping trapped in there, but rather to normalize a bad sense of dissonance with which you conflict yourself. You're looking for acceptance, not just from yourself, but by and large through others, to make it de rigueur.
_________________ Life has a twisted sense of humour, doesn't it. . . .
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Lyssa Har Har Harr
Gender : Posts : 8965 Join date : 2012-03-01 Location : The Cockpit
If strong enough of letting go of control is all what it is about, and role-playing the role of a female, what stops him from surrendering to an alpha male?
How is getting abused by a female more insightful and initiatory than getting abused by a male?
So a male can take a woman doing that to him, because he secretly knows she is weak? Is SM a subliminal narcissism?
If there's nothing hedonistic/erotic about it, what does it matter what gender the dom. is.?
Strength isn't just about being physically strong; most male-subs don't look for that quality in their domme.
Intellectual strength is what is really attractive. A well-educated, intelligent, intellectually astute female is very alluring and even intimidating; something erotic about it, something sublime...
It manifests in how She upholds herself, in her swagger.
Knowing that she could intellectually/psychologically over-power you is tantalizing.
I am not into this because of some low, base, hedonistic desires...
This also is a higher form of art, its style is what interests me, it is very awareness-raising, self-knowledge and self-communion and all...
To be strong is to be weak. To be weak is to be strong. To smell like shit is to smell like flowers. The reality is inverted, for the sake of your emotions.
A higher form of art:
_________________ "WOMEN BAD, CHURCH GOOD, NIGGERS BAD, WHITE GOOD, EUROPE CUCKED, PATRARCHY GOOD, ARISTOCRACY GOOD, DEMOCRACY BAD" - polishyouth
I'm too prideful, even irrationally, and too prideful of others, again, irrationally, to adorn willing submission as some "mystical" mode of enlightenment.
Revisited: if you think submission, especially of this erotic type as it were, is anyway "Nietzchean," then I'd like to adduce what Nietzsche imputed to Zarathustraian instincts:
Quote :
But that I may reveal to you my heart, to you, my friends: if there were Gods, how could I stand it not to be a God! Therefore, there are no Gods.
_________________ Life has a twisted sense of humour, doesn't it. . . .
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Hrodeberto
Gender : Posts : 1318 Join date : 2014-07-14 Age : 37 Location : Spaces
In Greece, before the crisis, banks used to offer good deals on loans...vacation loans they called them. All Greeks had a right to a good lifestyle, a nice vacation. Now imagine living a few kilometers from a beach, other travel hours to enjoy, and still wanting to take a loan to go to an island, or someplace else to enjoy the beach..or to go to some European destination to pretend you are a sophisticated, modern European. To pretend you are more than what you really are.
In my poor, goat-man mind, if I do not have the money, I do not buy, I do not go on vacation. But for them, these modern imbeciles, born and raised with a sense of entitlement, to be soft, demanding, envious, spoiled, that would require too much effort and time....best you live on credit. Easy, cheap...postponed suffering, for immediate gratification.
Among the Modern Nihilists, ALL deserve the same luxuries.
The credit crash occurs and most of these douche-bags find themselves with no money in the bank and a huge personal loan debt.
What do they do? They blame the banks for selling them loans, for enticing them with low-rate credit. They demand to live the lifestyle they are accustomed to. They were not imbeciles, it was the Bank's fault for victimizing them, for exploiting them in their weakness, their moment of need.
This reminds me of the Might is Right salon warrior of Ithaca NY. He prostrates himself, demanding to be raped, thinking nobody will take him up on it...and when someone does he screams the "safe word" nobody agreed on, and blames the other for abusing him, for shaming him. See, the professional victim, calling himself "warrior" is always blaming others for his own nature. He, like the modern Greeks, are not to blame...they were taken advantage of, shamed, and now they remember they have dignity. All those thirty years of tax evasion thieving, lying, pretending, nepotism and laughing at the world for working hard, and budgeting their expenses, was all part of a plant to take advantage of these morons.
Yes...if you go begging to be treated like a slut, and you, then are treated like one, then YOU are to blame, not the other who took you up on your offer. The limits you thought applied were only in your fuckin head. The universal love, you expected was in your empty head.
The organism is the limit upon nature. The organism imposes, as much as it can, its limits upon nature, upon otherness. Only a degenerate, brain-dead, weakling, calling himself "mighty" expects the world to protect him from himself, and expects compassion and fair-play and not being taken advantage of, when he presents himself as a willing, innocent, victim.
Might is Right fails before Right is Might. Respect is only possible between equals. Equals have willed the boundaries the other cannot cross. Noetic boundaries are imposed differently from physical boundaries.
The weak begging to be exploited should not be surprised when they are exploited. Lowering yourself to a doormat and then expecting to be respected and cared for, is Christian naivete.
Even your parents must be shown a line they cannot cross with you, because we all tell others exactly how they should treat us. Sometimes directly, sometimes with subtlety.
Satyr, when Lys exploited me, made me into her bitch-boy, I was still in denial about it; I repressed this aspect of myself, as I was ashamed of it.
Lys still owns me; I'm her property. She knows that I love her abuse, that I relish how she manipulates and instructs me; it hurts so good...
She is the only one who I allow to do this to me. The only reason I made a fuss the first time is because, as prior stated, I repressed this aspect of myself. And she knew this very well, which is why she was very patient and subtle with her devilish ploys; using hints, certain trigger words to arouse me.
What I said about her to Arcturus on ILP, all of it is true; she really is a Svengali, a femme-fatale.
I'm too prideful, even irrationally, and too prideful of others, again, irrationally, to adorn willing submission as some "mystical" mode of enlightenment.
Revisited: if you think submission, especially of this erotic type as it were, is anyway "Nietzchean," then I'd like to adduce what Nietzsche imputed to Zarathustraian instincts:
Quote :
But that I may reveal to you my heart, to you, my friends: if there were Gods, how could I stand it not to be a God! Therefore, there are no Gods.
Right, keyword, "endures"; that is, the will to power regardless of whatever obstactles are effectuated during self-imposed action and not rather the will to submission for the sake of submission, or, reinstated, not ascribing higher intrinsic value to the ideal itself, in effect turning it into an end all, as opposed to a means. You're verging on moral nihilism here: submission or obedience to some "higher" or "other" superimposed command, whether it is inherited and accustomed conscience or tradition, a God, a "categorical imperative," an eroticism, a Nothingness.
_________________ Life has a twisted sense of humour, doesn't it. . . .
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OhFortunae
Gender : Posts : 2311 Join date : 2013-10-26 Age : 30 Location : Land of Dance and Song
This is pathetic; is there some "psycho-dramatic" past you try to re-live or something. What are your intentions, do get sexually aroused by making this topic?
_________________ 1. "Youth, oh, youth! | of whom then, youth, art thou born? Say whose son thou art, Who in Fafnir's blood | thy bright blade reddened, And struck thy sword to my heart."
2. "The Noble Hart | my name, and I go A motherless man abroad; Father I had not, | as others have, And lonely ever I live."
