Overcoming the fear of Death.

This is, probably, one of the most important goals of my life: to overcome the fear of death. It is such an intense fear in the vast majority of organisms. But why? Why is death so scary? Is it because we think we will abide in some pitch blackness forever? Smothered by it? Is there some hell awaiting us sinners? Are we afraid of oblivion? Sleeping but never waking up again?

I don't believe in God or any religious afterlife, so it's not the concept of hell that bothers me. What bothers me is the thought of never waking up again, of oblivion.

What I have been doing so far to rid myself of this anxiety is to just remind myself that being anxious about death is not going to change anything. I'm going to die whether I'm anxious or not. This, actually, helps to alleviate the fear. Something else that helps are quotes of bravery like my signature quote by Ragnar Redbeard.


“Death and destruction are necessary to the health of the world, and therefore as natural, and lovable, as birth and life. Only priests and born cowards moan and weep over dying. Brave men face it with approving nonchalance.”

― Ragnar Redbeard


Good, abrasive machismo quotes like the one above really do kick the shit out of the fear of death within me. I don't want to die like some effeminate coward. I want to live and die like a warrior - laughing in the face of death.

I think this fear could also be reduced by thinking of death as passing into a deep, peaceful sleep. Nothing is going to harm you. You won't abide in some darkness of eternal melancholia. Death is a peaceful transition. From what I hear from many NDE ( Near death experiences ), it's even a glorious, euphoric experience.

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I'm going to get more extreme with my practices of exterminating the fear of death. I'm planning on going out in some remote forrest by myself, bringing along a tent and some camping gear. I will meditate on death in the silence, and then I will smoke some marijuana to confront my subconscious, where this fear abides clearly. I will face my fear like a man and overcome it. This is called " flooding " in psychology. I kind of got this idea from the Batman Begins movie. Bruce Wayne meets some warrior mystics on a mountain top dojo and they use psychedelics to confront the fear of death and then conquer it.

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The fear of death is the ultimate fear. To overcome this is truly something special. I subscribe to a warrior philosophy; nature is a world of war. There are so many threats out in the world. There are all kinds of creatures that have evolved to tear you to pieces and eat you. This planet is a cosmic gladiator game. If you want to survive, you must fight and overcome - you must be a warrior.

The ultimate thing to overcome is death. Imagine standing next to a person who has truly conquered it. Would he not seem like a Hercules? A Thor? A God? This is the way of the Overman.

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How do you guys deal with death?

I immerse myself in its horror.
I accept and feel its finality, its unyielding indifference. I let the void wash over me, and I rejoice for the life I still have.

To overcome the terror, a bit, have a child, preferably a boy.
Die knowing you've left something behind.
If not a child then leave behind an idea, a memory, or die defending a noble truth and all that you consider worth dying for.

I have a profound desire to be a Father and raise a son. I've even had dreams about it. It seems like a deep experience. In the future, when I am more financially stable, I will have a son. I will teach him the things I wasn't and explain to him early on how to survive in this world. He won't be clueless and emasculated like I once was.

If you don't mind me asking, how is your relationship with your son?

He will be 6 next month.
We have a perfect relationship.
He fights with me, seeks me out wherever I may go, antagonizes me and then asks for my counsel.

Being my son, and taking after me, he is polite with strangers, easy-going, not demanding, linguistically advanced, curious, and disciplined.
His teachers like him, and he prefers imagination to playing tag.

He has yet to taste the filth, and learn how to spit it out.

When the time comes, and if I am still alive, he will come asking me, and I, being who I am, will tell him ...but only after he's tasted it on his own beforehand.

I bet he is glad to have a good Father. I'm sure he will be even more glad when you reveal more wisdom to him as he matures.

One can view death as a fulfilment of one's life and avoidance of the fact that death is inevitable is probably an unhealthy attitude, especially for people in the second half of their lives as it will rob them of life's purpose and joyfulness.

Death for most of us is simply "the end" and this is never more obvious, than when a human life, a parent, partner or even a child's life comes to an end before our own eyes.  It is then we are faced with  death's finality and the thought one does not live forever.  It is then fear takes hold, it is then I realise I would never see my daughter again, it is then I hope she will be strong and brave.  That is what death means to me and that fear will never be overcome, but she will never know this.

I see it as a basic primal instinct, except humans can contemplate future loss, triggering this fear intended for short term danger.
Simply evolutionary baggage suitable for brutes.

Death is the antithesis of life. Death's weight directly correlates with that of life.

If one adores life, death will seem the cruelest blow. If one abhors life, death will seem the kindest blessing.

If you love your life, you can't defeat the power of death. All you can do is learn to accept it's place and react to it in a life affirming manner.

Live with the knowledge you have a precious opportunity, and follow the passion of your heart, don't sell yourself short for comfort.

If one lives a fulfilling life, they can meet death with open arms and a smile, 'Hello, friend. You should have seen what I just did, but alas, you had to be there', with full knowledge, that one got the best of the deal, and that nothing can take that away, for one never experiences a moment of death, all one will ever know is life.

Joe wrote : "If you love your life, you can't defeat the power of death. All you can do is learn to accept it's place and react to it in a life affirming manner."

Exactly.


Joe wrote : " If one lives a fulfilling life, they can meet death with open arms and a smile, 'Hello, friend. You should have seen what I just did, but alas, you had to be there', with full knowledge, that one got the best of the deal, and that nothing can take that away, for one never experiences a moment of death, all one will ever know is life."

This is precisely why I try to emphasize the here and now. I'm learning to let go of inhibitions. Only one life - why not make the best of it and go out with a bang?